Cat Letters to God ~ Mariane Holbrook ~ Living Each Day

Dear God -
When I get to heaven, will my spayed procedure be
reversed and what kind of terrible punishment
do you plan for the vet who did this to me?

Dear God -
Is it true that angel wings are made from spun hairballs?

Dear God-
Will there be mice in heaven? If so, can I
repent now for the ones I've eaten?

Dear God -
Baptists say immersion in water is necessary
for heaven. Can I get to heaven as a Methodist?

Dear God -
I assume you're going to punish my worthless,
unfaithful ex-husband, Whatz-Hiz-Name.
Are you open to suggestions?

Dear God -
Since you gave cats nine lives on earth,
does that mean we'll be in heaven nine times longer than dogs?

Dear God -
I've heard via the grapevine that my nemesis, Charlene the Cheshire,
has got religion. Would it upset your seating arrangement to put
her on the far side of heaven away from me?

Dear God -
I need to keep up my exercises in heaven.
Will there be climbable lace curtains there?

Dear God -
How close will I be to your bird aviary in heaven?
I like to have my snacks close by.

© Mariane Holbrook
Used with permission

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Midi playing ~ "Ragtime"
Courtesy All Piano Music